In the neighbourhood

It’s Friday, once again, and time for another update from North Vancouver.

I’ll start with a confession: the subject line of last week’s announcement email had a glaring typo that only one person pointed out: “The packing has begin”. Argh. So bad. Sadly, no points are awarded for pointing out errors in announcement emails because I cannot fix them. Once an email is sent, as we all know, it’s basically gone rogue and can never be captured or corrected.

But typos in these posts are definitely fixable — I fix them all the time because I make them all the time — and you can help with that. Everything you need (including the rules) is in the score sheet. Pay it a visit if that interests you. A serious contender can look to dethrone Anonymous Artist and Tally Sally for the top spots pretty quickly given my typo production rate.

Another note from last week’s post: I am reliably informed that it was boring. You know family. They will always tell you the truth.

And true it was. I had little to write about except the packing, so it was short and, well, dull. Sorry about that.

This week’s post will be better, I promise!

“Why is that?” you ask.

Because I found a bunch of signs that I really enjoyed, and I thought others would as well. I hope that is the case because you’re stuck with them!

The other day I was walking on a paved path and saw this. People who have been to Vancouver will know this sign. They’re all over town:

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It’s self explanatory: you must stand on the seat and handle bars while riding your bike. That’s how Canadians do it, and I guess they need to be reminded of the proper way to ride.

This particular path has a lot of other signs painted on it that give an indication of the kind of neighbourhood it’s in. This kind of thing:

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People playing Frisbee with their feet.

Just kidding. Obviously they’re playing basketball with their feet. Regardless, it’s a wholesome activity enjoyed by stick figures everywhere.

Then there’s this one:

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Here we see someone being chased. Or perhaps three people running from the scene of a crime. Happens all the time.

And there are several signs for a specific but mysterious activity:

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I’ve seen these same petroglyphs on rock walls in Arizona. No one understands the activity involved. Perhaps it involved a stick and rocks?

There are also scenes showing daily life:

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Here we see suburban Canadians going on a long journey in search of food or supplies. Perhaps the group on the right is actually moving to a new home, which could explain the toddler they are bringing with them on this expedition.

Not everyone can make such arduous treks, though, and those who cannot are also represented. There are the elderly and the young:

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And the prolific:

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Although, some suggest those who stayed behind were actually just taking their time and getting prepared to follow those who left with sniffer dogs:

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Sadly, not all the images are easily explained. For example:

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This could be a teacher with a ruler, or a conductor leading a band, or a robot with an oddly shaped TV in his hips, waving the remote above his head. We may never know what he is carrying, however, because:

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Clearly two of the locals stole it and ran off. (Note the object is carried by the left figure.) We don’t know if they were caught and brought to justice.

Other signs indicate this neighbourhood may be dangerous. For example, there are two schools of thought about this image:

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The first thinks this is someone waving over his shoulder at a big circle. Perhaps the individual depicted is happy there are no bike riders around at the moment.

An alternate view — the “Jones” theory — says the individual depicted is running from something large and round, perhaps a giant pizza or a black hole.

Arguments continue, and the true meaning may never be known.

Finally we have this graphic and disturbing image:

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In it we clearly see the locals have annoyed the local wildlife — perhaps by taunting it excessively — and are attempting to avoid being eaten… er… held responsible.

It is humbling to contemplate the number of stories going on around us every day which we will never know about. Clearly these people documented life in North Vancouver. Perhaps one day we‘ll know more about what these images meant to those living here when they were created.

In the process of documenting all of the above I may have found my tribe:

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Really. It even made one of the local newspapers!

And yes, I did a silly walk between the signs.

Finally, this real estate listing for a house in Felton California was shared with me by two readers last week. Scroll through the pictures. Keep going. Someone is going to make a sale one way or another.

PS: Yes, the packing has continued, the move is still on track, and life goes on. But all of that is boring so I have spared you. Cheers!

Written by

Sculptor/Artist. Former programmer. Former volunteer firefighter. Former fencer. Weirdest resume on the planet, I suspect.

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